DNR Prison

Okay- I confess, I might be a criminal.

Of course, it was purely an accident.

A few months ago, I purchased a compact fluorescent bulb. I was climbing the ladder to put the new bulb in and accidentally dropped it. It broke, so I tossed it in the garbage.

I did know that CFLs had mercury in them, but I figured, since the bulb was already broken and the hazardous material already released into the air, it would be okay to toss the bulb.

Now I find out from listening to Vicki McKenna’s show from a couple of days ago, this was not the proper way to dispose of the bulb.

Oops. Imagine the shame I feel right now.

It was kind of hard not to get the giggles as I was listening to Vicki’s podcast.

Immediately my mind took off and I was picturing myself sitting in a DNR prison.

As I sit, waiting to be processed through the DNR prison system, a fellow sitting directly to my left asks, “What are you in for?”

I answer “Failure to properly dispose of a CFL. I got 8-10. You?”

He answers “Illegal incandescent bulb trafficking and failure to acknowledge global warming. I got a mandatory 15 for it.”

Sitting right next to my new DNR prison buddy was another gentleman. He pipes in “I am in for obstructing a DNR officer.”

Curiously I asked “Really, how did that happen?”

He tells me “I stood in between a DNR officer and certain death for a mute swan. The DNR officer was attempting to blow the brains out of a beautiful mute swan. I just could not stand back and let this beautiful innocent creature be killed by a DNR officers just because the swan was not native!”


“Sentence”? I ask.

“LIFE!” he exclaimed.

Wow, remind me to never get in between a mute swan and the DNR!

Go ahead and laugh my conservative friends, but you know that some liberal is reading this right now and thinking “Hmm, what a great idea. DNR prison!”.